Monday, January 4, 2016

It's A Wonderful Life Alternate Ending

Since Saturday Night Live already did an ending where Mr. Potter gets his, I decided to write an ending where another character gets a much-needed comeuppance.


UNCLE BILLY stumbles in to his room, drunkenly singing “Auld Lang Syne” and sipping from his flask of rotgut. He clumsily fumbles for the light switch, illuminating CLARENCE, who is sitting in the one chair in the room, his hands neatly folded in his lap.
Clarence: Hello, Uncle Billy. You certainly made a mess of things, didn’t you? Uncle Billy: Wassat? Who are you? Clarence: 'Remember, George, no man is a failure who has friends.' A lovely sentiment, isn’t it? Uncle Billy: Huh? Clarence: And George certainly has a lot of friends, I can tell you that. And friends can support you, love you, lift you up when you are down. But sometimes a friend can’t do what needs to be done. Uncle Billy: Are you one of George’s friends? Clarence: Oh no. Clarence rises from the chair. Clarence: I’m not his friend. Clarence approaches Uncle Billy. Clarence: I’m his guardian. Clarence strangles Uncle Billy with piano wire.

No comments:

Post a Comment